


Happier This Way

by Rhinoyo



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Gen, Gender Dysphoria, Questioning, Trans Hinata Shouyou, Trans Nishinoya Yuu, author doesn’t know what he’s doing, hinata’s confused and noya comforts him, romance is implied?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-21
Updated: 2020-04-21
Packaged: 2021-02-23 01:33:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23770369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rhinoyo/pseuds/Rhinoyo
Summary: Hinata really was the embodiment of sunshine, wasn’t he? Although today, he seemed just a bit dimmer./Noya comforts a struggling Hinata.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Nishinoya Yuu
Comments: 5
Kudos: 213





	Happier This Way

The break Hinata was taking was a lot longer than usual. He had quickly excused himself in the middle of practice, to which Kageyama scowled and told him to hurry up. Of course everyone noticed; Hinata wouldn’t miss out on volleyball.

Noya noticed more, though. And worried more. “I’ll go get him!” he waved to his teammates, exiting the building and patrolling around the side of it.

He smiled as the ginger-haired boy came into view. He was laying his head on the wall, hugging his knees and looking at the sky.

“Shoyooooooo!” Noya yelled, running over to him.

Hinata seemed to relax upon hearing his voice, smiling as Noya crouched down next to him. Hinata was, to put it simply, adorable. The way his eyes closed and his cheeks rose as he grinned. The orange hair that rested above his lashes and the small freckles that were barely noticeable. 

Noya noticed, though. 

Hinata really was the embodiment of sunshine, wasn’t he? Although today, he seemed just a bit dimmer.

“Hi, Noya-san.”

“Is something up?” 

Hinata expected the question. He always avoided these questions. “Not... really.”

Noya tilted his head, disappointed. He’d love to know what was going on in that scrambled mind of his. But he wasn’t going to push for it. He sat down next to him, resting an arm on his knee and placing the other at his side. If Hinata needed time, then that’s what Noya would give him.

A few moments of silence passed. Noya glanced at Hinata, who looked as if he was debating whether or not to speak. His mouth opened and closed multiple times. He took a long, deep breath, then gazed upward.

Hinata’s next words were spoken as if they were from an ancient forbidden book. “I, uh, I’m trans.”

If they were from a book, Noya had definitely read it before. It was common knowledge at that point. It’d never been said outright, but everyone could tell. His body, his voice, his face; they weren’t exactly a male’s. “Yeah, I know.”

Hinata winced. He must’ve expected to hear it. “You could tell.”

Was that a statement or a question? Noya contemplated his reply. Whether Hinata would continue or not, this was a time when he should let him do the speaking. “Mhm.”

Hinata held his knees tighter. He wasn’t going to continue. He looked sad. Noya knew this sadness, because that book was not just one he had read, it was one he had spoken.

“Me too,” Noya said, speaking it again.

The ginger raised his head and looked at him. “Huh?”

“Hahaha, I’m trans too.”

Hinata clearly disbelieved him. He scanned his face, looking for any signs of a lie, but found none. “Wh-- Really?”

“Yeah.”

He still looked shocked. He turned to the ground, muttering, “I... couldn’t tell.”

Yeah, that was it. He didn’t pass. That was the problem. Noya considered giving him an energetic encouragement to cheer him up, but then he continued.

“Noya-san, how did you know you were?”

He wasn’t expecting that question. “Mm… I was uncomfortable, for one. I just felt out of place I guess. Aaaaand that’s really the main thing there.”

“Can’t you be uncomfortable as a girl but still be one?”

“If you’re uncomfortable as a girl then why would you want to be one?”

Hinata bit his lip. “I don’t like my body, I really don’t. I’m happier as a boy, I am! But what if I’m not one? I… I feel like I’m pretending. I don’t think I am! But what if I am? I’m not like how Daichi-san is, or how Kageyama or Tsukishima are. They’re definitely boys, they’re strong and cold and confident. But I’m not. I’m more nervous and smiley and excited than they are. So I was thinking, what if I’m faking? Everything about me seems like it should be for a girl, so--”

“Okay hey, chill out,” Noya interrupted, placing his hand on Hinata’s arm. “Man, you’re a guy.”

Hinata made eye contact, trying to slow down his breathing. Then he lowered his eyes, looking the dimmest he ever had. A sorrowful, confused, and desperate sentence escaped his lips. “But what if... I’m not?”

Noya took a moment to respond. 

This wasn’t something he’d been through personally. He was always masculine. He always liked “male” things. And he’d always been sure that he was male. That is, as sure as a trans person can be. But there was one thing he was confident about.

“Shoyo,” he said, lifting his chin to make eye contact again. “If you’re happier this way, then be this way.”

Hinata stared at him.

His lip quivered. He began shaking, and he cried.

Noya pulled him into a hug.

Just then, deep down, he accepted that. He was happier this way, wasn’t he?

**Author's Note:**

> okay well there’s that haha. 
> 
> i wrote this to cope with my own struggles so it’s pretty self-projecty. hopefully this can help other trans people be confident in themselves, even if it’s just a little bit :) then again i am incapable of writing something that can make an impact and it’s really short so i don’t know if that’s possible but anyway yeah! noyahina is such a comfort ship for me and i love both of them a lot. they are perfect.


End file.
